Affirmation

Sharing me is not something that comes easy. That's partly because things have been changing a LOT and it's sometimes hard to keep up with who I am and where my life is in the now.

I'm a work in progress.

The playlist is a start. These songs are a progression of emotional sharing.

In the past, I felt like I had to be what everyone expected me to be. That's not an easy life to live. Some of you have been in the same place, so you know what I mean. At times, I had no sense of self, because I was someone different for each person. For myself, I was no one. There was nothing left over at the end of the day.

It got to the point where changes had to be made, or there would be nothing at all of "me" to share with anyone. On my journey, I've often made the wrong choices and had to go back to start over. Somehow, I discovered the strength of will to permit myself that luxury.

I had to figure out who I am. It's hard to imagine anyone not knowing that by their 40's. But there have always been plenty of people telling me who and what I should be, but nobody ever asked me who I want to be ... not even me.

It took time and patience, but my charms and my flaws (which have a beauty of their own) began to emerge. Learning to embrace all the things that are uniquely "me" may take a lifetime, but I'm finally up for the challenge. I may not be perfect, but at least now I can be perfectly me.

With that self-acceptance came an unexpected bonus. The person that I discovered inside has a lot to offer. Who knew? There are days when I'm angry, neurotic, impatient, shallow, or just plain unreasonable. There are occasional, increasingly rare flashbacks to the "hard times". I'm learning to deal with myself more gently when that happens. I've learned to remind myself that, underneath, I'm still kind-hearted, understanding, submissive and tolerant, slow to anger, quick to forgive. I still give too much of my time and energy to people who don't really appreciate it. I still offer hugs and an empathetic ear to a hurting soul. I still turn the other cheek. It's all part of who I am.

I am a work in progress.

Five for Friday ... Venting!

(Play Trav's Meme - it ROCKS!)

This year, I'm not terribly enamoured of my job.

Somehow, the teaching profession seems to have changed ...

Perhaps it's the destructurization of the traditional family unit?

Perhaps our methods and goals have become oversimplified.
Do we expect less of our students?Or is it possible that they have been allowed to expect less from themselves?


Maybe it's simply that all the negative imagery of stereotypical media has finally impacted our youth.

Whatever the reason, right now it's just not the job I've loved for so many years.

But I guess it COULD be worse ...

Thursday

Another snow day for us .... :D

Wordless Wednesday - AAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

I KNOW it's only Tuesday, dammit!

WORKS FOR TEACHERS, TOO ...

Five for Friday

Congratulations, Trav!

Is anyone else familiar with the 70's Canadian band, Klaatu? They were mostly pretty obscure to say the very least ... unless you are a Beatles fan ...

The interesting story about this band was that they were rumoured to be the Beatles, in hiding. The rumour came about as a result of the "Beatles-esque" sound of their 1976 album 3:47 EST (retitled Klaatu by US Capital Records executives, who thought the original title was too obscure). The complete lack of biographical information on the album led reviewers to claim that it was an anonymous project by the Beatles. The rumour was fed by various "clues" released by radio announcers and print media, thus sparking a world-wide frenzy for a time.

Interestingly, the band became popular enough to have spawned an annual cult convention, called KlaatuKon, which still occurs in Toronto ... it's the only place you might have a chance to hear Klaatu live these days.

Here's the WHOLE story behind the rumours, if you're interested:

http://www.klaatu.org/klaatu1.html

I thought this was a cool bit of Canadiana to share with y'all. Maybe you'll recognize some of their songs - couldn't find enough on Playlist, so I turned to Youtube for today's blog. You decide - did they REALLY sound like the Beatles?

By the way, the name? If you are a fan of cheesy old sci-fi movies, you'll recognize it as the name of the extra-terrestrial portrayed by Michael Rennie in the classic 1951 film "The Day The Earth Stood Still".

The Nightmare Continues ...

Can't post, I have the BUSY

Exams this week.

Report cards in the next week.

Forms for music festival due on Friday.

Mom in hospital.

Feeding and daily upkeep of Dad.

Piano lessons.

Tae Kwondo classes.

B-man sick.

Steve sick.

Best friend sick.

BAD roads - icy.

Work.

Dog.

Housework.

Laundry.

Ever have one of those weeks?

Five for Friday

Sometimes, for no apparent reason, a song enters my mind and then it JUST. WON'T. LEAVE.

This week's Five is the soundtrack that's been running through my head this week.

Explanations?

My senior stage band has been working on an arrangement of Rock Lobster. The opening bass line in particular gets stuck in my head because my bass player wanders around the school air-playing it and singing it to "dah-dah-dah doo-bee-doo-bee doo-ahh".

Hit The Road Jack ... did you ever have a song that keeps cropping up in life, in weird ways? This would be it for me. When I was a teen, I would listen to the Wolfman Jack Show on the radio late at night after I was supposed to be asleep in bed (sorry mom :P), which was the only time the airwaves came in clear enough to receive the New York AM radio station which broadcast it. That was his theme song. A few years later, I picked up an old Ray Charles vinyl LP at a flea market because the song "Georgia" was on it. So was that song and I listened to it and remembered the good ol' days when I was a kid (I was about 18 at this time ...). A few years ago, my son was about 2 1/2 and he had a little friend named Jack in his daycare class. For some reason, that kid reminded me of the song and I added it to my car-singing repertoire. The B-man picked up on it, learned it ... and got into trouble a few months later by using it to tease poor little Jack in the playground.

I got no apparent catalyst behind that James Bond Theme ... haven't even seen Dr. No (or whatever movie it's from ... NOT a JB fan) I just started hearing it and now it follows me around ...

It's all about the bagpipes, man. Last summer, B-man and I were invited to the Nova Scotia International Tattoo. Massed pipe and drum corps from several Commonwealth countries. Yeah. Personally, I think it might just be overload from that. But Mull of Kintyre? Geez, I haven't heard that song since the McCartney concert the summer BEFORE that. Dunno, is that a coincidence? Regardless, it's there in my mind's ear.

Almost forgot to mention The Last Unicorn - this one's easy to explain. When my son was a baby, he was given a Kenny Loggins CD of lullabies. Ever since he was old enough to choose (about age 2 for my strong-willed child), he has insisted on having this particular song on repeat as he goes to sleep. That means I have heard it about 120 times a night over the past almost-6 years ... any questions? I have one - WHEN is he going to get tired of it? Please??

Join Trav's Meme - it's fun!

Wednesday Weather Report

Moncton on 13 January, 2011 (Updated)

TENNESSEE :SOUTH CAROLINA:
MONCTON, NB

Supposed to be a storm here tonight - 10-15 cm in total. Nor'easter with plenty of wind. Hope everybody else is surviving the weird winter weather. Seems like, so far, we've gotten less snow than our friends in Tennessee and South Carolina.

Can anybody else see the irony in that?

UPDATE: In actuality, the storm yesterday veered north and gave us a little more snow than we were expecting - about 40 cm by yesterday evening. It's so pretty!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I hope everyone else had a wonderful Christmas and New Year, or whatever you were celebrating! I can unequivocably state that this was the best holidays of my LIFE!

We didn't go anywhere outside of province, gifts were scanty because Steve was laid off in November and I never did get the house cleaned ... but we had a constant stream of friends and family, we pulled out board games and shut down our computers for days on end, we FINALLY got enough snow to go outside and play, and we spent a lot of quality time just "being". (How do you explain the beauty of that?)

I'm pleasantly exhausted and work will be a welcome rest. I'm happy. Now ... how are you doing?