Winter in New Brunswick. Bleahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Survival seemed the best I could hope for. That, and putting distance between myself and memories of the past. I needed to move on from the things that were dragging me down and preventing me from finding my groove again.
I gained weight since Christmas. Again. *sighs* I suppose I need to address that soon, but I'm in the grip of this horrible apathy right now that invariably signals the end of the winter blahs and precedes the first harbingers of spring here in this muddy wasteland of pre-springlike weather we've been suffering for the past two weeks. I just can't bring myself to care right now.
I have been dating. For some reason, no matter how bad I think I look, dating has never been difficult. Must be my scintillating personality. Yeah. That must be it. *rolls eyes* The last guy who asked me out was 15 years my junior though and when I found that out, I 'bout nearly swallowed my tongue. He sure didn't LOOK 29 ... I don't want to end up being one of "THOSE" kinds of women ... I guess I should've been tipped off by the number of times he used "like" as an interjection in his speech ...
"Like, do you want to go to, like, dinner this Friday, Corinne?" sez he. "I know we've only talked, like, a couple of times but, like, I feel we've got a lot in, like, common."
"Like, sure, that might be, like, fun." I reply, like, certain that he's, like, joking with the, like, juvenile speech patterns. But he, like, totally wasn't ... (okay, slightly exaggerated ...)
So I went to dinner with Junior and had a good meal (like I needed THAT!) and a few laughs (many at his unwitting expense, sadly enough). He's a very pleasant young man but, as I told him during the course of our evening out, I felt like his godmother or something and, although I found him charming (yes, I used that word and confused the heck outta the poor kid), I didn't think we had enough in common to date. He kept assuring me that he found my "maturity" wildly attractive and I was hard pressed to refrain from laughing because these hackneyed lines he delivered were accompanied by his interpretation of a smoulderingly meaningful gaze and heavy-lidded glances at my cleavage. Poor guy. I was so tempted to offer him a glass of milk but I was a good girl and only once did I prop up "the girlz" by crossing my arms under them and resting the whole package on the edge of the table. It was entertaining (and vaguely satisfying) watching his eyes bug out and his jaw drop. Kids these days ... (shakes my head).
Don't know why I was moved to blog here again after over a month, but it just struck me and so here I am. Maybe I'll come here more often. It's a nice place and I like Blogger much better than most of the other places I've tried. For whatever reason, this place feels the most like home. Maybe it's because I still feel such close ties to the people who originally led me here. I miss them, even though I don't watch American Idol or any tv shows anymore, really and that's what brought us together in the first place. I've become a bit of a lone wolf, I suppose, especially these past months, trying to deal with my losses. I suppose I will always feel close to my old Idol buddies, even though I've drifted away ...